Adriana Lima Latest Victoria Secret Photos

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Adriana Lima and Candice Swanepoel met up to rub short silk dresses together, do some really good pouts and launch the new Victoria’s Secret fragrance, ‘Bombshell’, over the weekend. The company’s fragrant fragrance spokesman said of the new smell: “Together, the sparkling fruits are balanced by sultry warmth for a fresh sensuality that is confident, sexy, glamorous and ultra-feminine. We designed this fragrance to be instantly memorable, one of a kind. Just like a Victoria’s Secret bombshell.” Meanwhile, everyone else present just stood there and gawped.



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Bombshell joins ‘Victoria, Supermodel’, ‘Body by Victoria’, ‘Dream Angels’ ‘Heavenly’, ‘Victoria's Secret Pink’, ‘Very Sexy for Her’, ‘Very Sexy for Him’, ‘Sexy Little Things’ and ‘Sexual Secret’ on the list of expensive stinks produced by the company. Ten different perfumes is milking it a bit, but if it means Lima and Swanepoel getting all cuddly every time they launch a new one, that’s totally cool. Please, bring the stink. But there’s a decision to be made. If you could take one of the models home with you, which would it be? Adriana ‘set nut sack to self-destruct mode’ Lima or Candice ‘name like a tasty confectionary’ Swanepoel? Put your cards on the table, gentlemen. Ladies, you can vote too.



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Yesterday we told you about Adriana Lima's excursion to the beach. Which was obviously very delightful. Well, prepare to be delighted and experience numerous feelings and emotions, some of which might be happiness.* Sadly though, like so many of the angels from Victoria's Secret, Adriana Lima is married and has a child. Which on one hand makes her a MILF, but on the other makes her even more unattainable.



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However we do propose a solution, which does involve more time traveling, and a spot of murder in the direction of Adriana's basketball playing husband. But we won't make you do anything you don't want to. But if you do happen to find yourself with a time machine and in a trans-time-dimensional killing spree kind of mood, then you better off her previous romancers Prince Wenzeslaus of Liechtenstein and Lenny Kravitz too. Actually no, don't hurt Lenny Kravitz, he's written some banging tunes. Like this. Anyway, you're here to see pictures not bang on about Lenny Kravitz. If you do want to bang on about Lenny Kravitz. Then go here. Otherwise continue your optical journey to the pictures below.



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Adriana Lima was in Miami this week to top up her tan and launch the latest ‘Bombshell’ Fragrance Collection at the Victoria’s Secret store in the Aventura Mall. During the promotion, customers were able to sign up for bombshell makeovers with the VS make up artists while free t-shirts, photos and autographs were the order of the day if you parted with enough cash on in store purchases.



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Adriana Lima has been grabbing a lot of headlines this week after posing in the $2m diamond-encrusted Bombshell Fantasy Bra at the Victoria’s Secret Soho store in New York. The Bombshell Fantasy Bra was designed in collaboration with Italian jeweller Damiani and consists of over 3,000 jewels and took 1,500 hours for six craftsmen to complete. All that money and hard work and the first thing I’d want to do it pop the hook and toss it on the floor…



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When your trade is looking hotter than the sun, as it is for 29-year-old Lima, you have to keep yourself in good condition. Which is way it’s taken two shakes of lambs tail for Lima to get back into cover gracing shape after giving birth to her first daughter Valentina Lima (What?). Here the Victoria’s Secret mega-babe is on the cover of V Spain’s ‘Sexy Body Issue’ which features 50 of the hottest bodies in the world, live ones we imagine. Lima appears on the cover in nowt but a little cardigan, and looks in fine figure. Though you have to wonder what it will be like growing up with a mum like that, bringing boyfriends home will be a nightmare. Just having them gawping at your mum all day. And if she has a son next? Well, that’s a different problem all together…You can see more of Adriana on her profile page.



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Adriana Lima is not technically Spanish. Well, she's not at all Spanish, on account of her being from Brazil. But the Victoria's Secret model does an excellent impression of someone both Spanish and almost illegally hot in Spanish Vogue. So well done to her.



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Adriana Lima is, in the tradition of magazine shoots of buxom mediterranean-looking women, dressed up to look like Sofia Loren in her heyday, with bosoms wherever you look. Some might decry this as hackneyed, we prefer to think of it as classic. We don't read Spanish so we don't even have to pretend to care what the accompanying interview says. However, we're going to assume it says something along the lines of "Ha-wa-wa-wawawawawa".



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Despite the way her name reads, Adriana Lima is not llama. She is also not a lime. You may have already known this, but there is probably one soppy little fella out there, nibbling his fingernails and fretting about how on earth he is going to phrase Adriana's name at prestigious social functions. Well Berty (we're going to call him Berty) you can now talk about Adriana without fear.



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Meanwhile on a beach, somewhere sunny and expensive, the lady in question - Adriana Lima - is sunning herself in a bikini and looked sodding brilliant. A little while later, when pictures of her were processed and put up on the internet, a group of feeble men chained to computers in London, would come over a bit flustered. (That's us by the way.)



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All of those preceding events lead us up to here. Today. This moment. Well, maybe not this exact moment, because you might be reading this hundreds of years from now, when you have flying cars and robot pets. If you are then can you shoot someone with a laser just for us. Proper vapourise them, doesn't matter if you get arrested, just jump in a time machine and sort things out.



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Actually whilst you're using a time machine can you come back to Wednesday 28 July 2010 at 5:55PM and give us a future burger. Ah here you are now. Right on time. Thanks future man. Mmmmm, this is a tasty future burger we're eating. Nom, nom, nom.



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Obviously supermodel Adriana Lima and I have had a love affair for several years now, that’s pretty clear, but I promised her I would keep in under wraps because we wouldn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea. I mean, she’s a supermodel and I’m a celebrity blogger, society says that our relationship is forbidden. Well here she is blowing me a kiss at some Victoria’s Secret fashion night outt, completely blowing our cover. Thanks a lot sweetheart. I’ve got a lot of blogging relationships I need to maintain and now that they know that we’ve got a thing going, that’s all going to change… They’re all going to be over at my house at bath time.



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I’m sick of all the VMA pictures, I’m sick of a pregnant Hilary Duff and I’m sick of blogging in my boxer shorts, so I needed to class things up a bit. I’ve put on some tight European boxer briefs and I’ve got these shots of Adriana Lima teasing us in some sexy lingerie. I love it. The woman is a piece of art, she should be in a hotness museum… Hopefully an interactive museum where we’re allowed to touch the art. These shorts aren’t fitting right anymore.



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Here’s supermodel Adriana Lima at the launch of the new Showstopper bra from Victoria’s Secret. I don’t understand this crap, if you really want a showstopper, put the damn supermodel in the damn bra. It’s a no brainer to me. Anyhow, the woman is still really sexy and the bra looks like, well it looks like every other bra I’ve ever seen, but you get the idea. I love the sexy faces she making just to me…. Just me!



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Here’s supermodel and super MILF Adriana Lima proving that having a baby pop out of you doesn’t mean the end to having a great bikini body. So all you moms out there take note and stop your complaining and start your Pilates because your husbands don’t deserve anything less. You’re welcome fellas.



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I don’t give a crap about fashion, you’d understand if you saw what I was wearing right now, but I like looking at supermodels all dressed up in the latest Haute Couture as they say. Here’s Adriana Lima looking as sexy as ever in some high fashion photoshoot. Obviously I don’t really care about the clothing, but supermodels making sexy faces in see through dresses have always been one of my favorite things in life. Enjoy.



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Here are a few new pictures of Adriana Lima modeling some sexy Victoria’s Secret bras and lingerie and what not, looking as sexy as ever. Does this woman ever have a bad day? Not that I want to see her looking rotten or anything, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen her looking like an ordinary woman. Who am I kidding? She’s no ordinary woman, she’s a supermodel dammit! She can’t help but look perfect all the time. Poor thing.



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You know it’s a good day when you’ve got pictures of a trio of Victoria’s Secret hotties hanging out together with their tops off. Here are Candice Swanepoel, Adriana Lima and Erin Heatherton airing out their lady lumps in some cute little undies. This is good stuff, all that’s missing is a celebrity blogger wearing nothing but a smile and wrist brace for his chronic carpal tunnel syndrome and we’ve got ourselves one hell of a foursome. Call me.



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I thought that my earlier pictures of Miranda Kerr’s big old supermodel breasts were going to be a good way to finish off the week, that is until I found these shots of Adriana Lima’s even bigger supermodel breasts hanging out of various bras and lingerie and what have you. You’re welcome. This is more like it, look at those perfect things squeezed together like they were meant to be exposed this way. Amazing. I want to get drunk and pass out in those things. Call me.



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Here are a few of the hottest Victoria’s Secret models strutting their stuff while they show off their latest line of bathing suits for really really hot people. I wonder if average women hate seeing Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio and Candice Swanepoel trying to sell them swimwear. I know I don’t, I’d like to see them try selling me more things like baby oil or Slip & Slides or pretty much anything that will get them half naked and oiled up. Hot.



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The Victoria’s Secret fashion show was over and done with months ago, I miss it already, but I’ve just found some of the best pictures from the event. Here’s supermodel Adriana Lima dancing it up behind the scenes with her incredibly hot breasts. There’s not really much to say here, those things are amazing. Now I know why that bra costs a million dollars, forget about the hundreds of diamonds covering it, look at it’s magical powers. Priceless.



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Here are a team of Victoria’s Secret models out pushing their new line of lingerie called ‘Incredible’ in New York City the other day. What I find incredible is that not one of these hotties is wearing any of the damn lingerie. What the hell kind of promotion is this? Not Adriana Lima, not Candice Swanepoel, not Lily Aldridgeand not Erin Heatherton. Nobody, not even the sad faced one in pink on the end that I don’t recognize. What a waste of some quality talent.



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Here’s supermodel Adriana Lima looking awesome in some Victoria’s Secret photoshoot, hanging out in her lingerie, playing with a nice bouquet of flowers and pretty much showing off some sweet supermodel front meat. Tasty. How could anyone not find this sexy? She could be doing the same thing with a bouquet made out of cat feces and it would still be pretty damn hot. I guess that’s what happens when you’ve got incredible breasts like these, if they were mine I’d never leave the house.



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I don’t know what’s going on today, first Candice Swanepoel shows up in her sexy lingerie, and now Adriana Lima makes and appearance topless in her underwear. Am I dying? Because my last will and testament clearly states that if I’m dying I need at least two hotties in lingerie preferably topless at my bedside, it’s a pretty standard request, any half decent attorney can draw it up for you. Anyhow, I’m going to have some great dreams during my afternoon nap. Good times.



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Here’s Victoria’s Secret hottie Adriana Lima doing that annoying thing where she promotes some new lingerie or bras or something without actually putting any of it on. I don’t see the point, it just seems like such a waste. I guess it’s alright, she’s still hot as hell and she’s wearing a short little red dress so It’s not the end of the world. I guess I can always look at some hot Adriana Lima half naked pictures from my archives… That’s more like it.



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Obviously I knew that Adriana Lima’s breasts were spectacular, she’s a supermodel and that’s just part of the job, but I had no idea they were THIS spectacular. My jaw dropped so far when I saw these pictures that it hit me in the nut-sack. I just spoke to my attorney and if I’m ever in a coma, as part of my Do Not Ressusitated order I want Adriana to smother me to death with those things. What a way to go. It’s in my will now so it’s official.



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It’s that time of year again, the Victoria’s Secret fashion show is just around the corner and all the top supermodels get to try on their trashy lingerie. Here’s Adriana Lima at a fitting for her elaborate costumes that nobody in their right mind would ever wear. If some chick walked into my bedroom with six foot wings on I might be a little concerned that she’s a nutjob and that she’d stab me in my sleep. Obviously I’d still sleep with her, crazy chicks are good in bed.



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I wanted to save these pictures for tomorrow, but they’re just too damn hot I couldn’t bring myself to keep them from you perverts for that long. I’m just that nice a guy. Here’s supermodel Adriana Lima’s sweet supermodel cleavage spilling out of her bra like a cornucopia of delicious breasts. I’m guessing this is the new line of Victoria’s Secret lingerie that I will only ever see in pictures because nobody loves me enough to model this kind of thing for me in real life. At least not without paying for it.



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I don’t think I have to tell you that a supermodel like Adriana Lima is going to look pretty damn good in nothing but a pair of jeans and a $2 million diamond encrusted brassiere. Well here she is doing just that for some sort of Victoria’s Secret promotional photographs for their new Bombshell Fantasy Bra. As far as I can tell, the only she seems to be promoting are boners… Mission accomplished.



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I don’t know what could possibly be a better way to restart the website after some nerd tried to take me out than with some shots of supermodel Adriana Lima stuffing her gorgeous breasts into a $2 million diamond encrusted bra. I guess having pictures of her taking her boobs OUT of a $2 million diamond encrusted bra might have been a better way, but it’s far too late for that now. Here she is unveiling the new Victoria’s Secret Bombshell Fantasy Bra in New York. It’s good to be back.



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In case you weren’t already down on yourself about staying home alone on Valentine’s Day repainting the numbers on your Dungeons and Dragons dice, here’s Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio and friends teasing us with some semi nude pictures for DT Magazine. They’re supermodels, they’re not real, I bet they’re not as happy as you are. Keep telling yourself that.



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Here’s Adriana Lima recreating Amy Winehouse for some Magazine. Surprisingly, she looks damn hot considering that Amy Winehouse is probably the nastiest woman on Earth. Then again, Adriana could dress up as an Islamic Jihadist and look good and if that was the case, I’d let her mount the jihad in my pants.



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If I told you that these Adriana Lima pictures were from Elle Magazine would you believe me? Well, they are. I’m going to have to cancel my subscription to Maxim and FHM because the ladies are pushing the boundaries in this photoshoot. Keep it up!



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The 2008 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show has arrived! If you were wondering, that’s why there were so many posts on them the last few days. Every year these pictures look the exact same. Sure the girls are absolutely stunning but I’m getting a little bored. They need to change it up next year because you can only watch it so many times before it loses it’s lustre.

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We’re going to let you in on a secret – unlike gorgeous lingerie model Adriana Lima, we don’t actually know that much about bras. Which is weird, considering how many of them we see on a daily basis (maybe four or five times the average, more on Wednesday and Fridays thanks to the Week in Women) and still they remain something of a mystery to us. You’d think that after the raw amount of bras we’ve seen – most often with breasts in them, to be fair – that at least a vague technical expertise would have rubbed off on us by osmosis.



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And yet, crushingly, nothing. So when Adriana Lima brings out a new bra from our favourite bra-crafters Victoria’s Secret called the Showstopper bra, and fails to wear it properly on camera – instead merely draping it over her shoulder like an ineffective kitbag – we’re not entirely sure what it does, or why it does it. It offers “no-show coverage", which basically means the bra is invisible. Not invisible in a sexy Emperor’s New Clothes way, especially if you pair it with an invisible bra and an invisible dress, but more that it’s not at all visible under clothes. In that it doesn’t leave any lumps.



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Good old Adriana Lima. Even though the other Victoria’s Secret girls seem to get more coverage (like Candice Swanepoel, for example – you almost can’t move for the sheer number of words we’ve written about the saucy South African) she’s always there. Sometimes she’s in the background, wearing something tight and posing languorously. Sometimes she’s helping the other girls deliver interviews to camera.



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But she very rarely gets an article all to herself. In fact, it was way back in February – yes, cast your minds back to when this country was a frozen, icy wasteland and Valentine’s Day loomed heavy on the horizon like some sort of romantic sword of Damocles – that we last featured her all on her lonesome, like she deserves. In an unusually Homer Simpson-esque move, she was eating flowers at the time. We’re not entirely sure why but it might point to the secret behind her fantastic lithe figure.



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Well we figured that this injustice has gone on too long! Luckily, so did the good people at Blumarine, and they arranged to have some pictures taken of the lovely Miss Lima in a variety of sexy clothes. Which is just as well, really, else this article would have just been words with no pictures. And that wouldn’t have been much fun at all. So enjoy. Hopefully these pictures of Adriana will propel you through the stagnant morass that is Wednesday afternoon and onto the glittering hinterlands of Thursday morning, where it’s only a short step to the glorious, brilliant sunlight of quarter to five on Friday afternoon. Godspeed, everyone.



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Wouldn’t you just know it? Valentine's Day is coming up and the lovely folks at Victoria’s Secret are making hay while the sun shines. Yup, apparently there’s some sort of connection between ridiculously sexy lingerie and Valentine's Day. So VS have been showing off what you might be lucky enough to get this year – Adriana Lima. Oh, hang on, it’s just the lingerie. Ok fine, your girlfriend is not going to buy you Adriana Lima for Feb the 14th, but to soften the blow we’ve got her right here for you.



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I thought that my earlier pictures of Miranda Kerr’s big old supermodel breasts were going to be a good way to finish off the week, that is until I found these shots of Adriana Lima’s even bigger supermodel breasts hanging out of various bras and lingerie and what have you. You’re welcome. This is more like it, look at those perfect things squeezed together like they were meant to be exposed this way. Amazing. I want to get drunk and pass out in those things. Call me.



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Here are a few of the hottest Victoria’s Secret models strutting their stuff while they show off their latest line of bathing suits for really really hot people. I wonder if average women hate seeing Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio and Candice Swanepoel trying to sell them swimwear. I know I don’t, I’d like to see them try selling me more things like baby oil or Slip & Slides or pretty much anything that will get them half naked and oiled up. Hot.



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Well, it’s that time of year again: when Victoria’s Secret gathers all the hottest models in the world and puts them on an airplane to film the greatest lesbian orgy ever! OK, we all know that isn’t the case, but one can always dream. Actually, Adriana Lima, Heidi Klum, Alessandra Ambrosio, Izabel Goulart, Marisa Miller, Selita Banks and company are out promoting their upcoming fashion show, and new Victoria’s Secret lingerie line. Wow, that was a mouthful. Know what else is a mouthful? Izabel’s hot ass in those jeans. I wouldn’t mind biting into that.



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Here’s Adriana Lima at LA International airport’s security check point. Now, the obvious thing to say here is that I wouldn’t mind being the guy who gets to frisk Adriana Lima as she walks through the metal detector, but that would be a lie. I wouldn’t want to be “just” that guy. I’d much rather be the guy who gets to pick out her panties every morning.



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What the hell is going on with my girl Adriana Lima? Lately, it’s been hit-or-miss with her, and today it’s a little bit of both. I’m digging the cleavage action, but the old school Hollywood-themed outfit and makeup is throwing me off my game. Why can’t she just be a good little supermodel, and show up to an event wearing a bikini? Is that really too much to ask?



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Here’s Adriana Lima at the “Dance For Tolerance” fundraiser. It’s an event to bring to kids together from around the world and you know, learn to be friends or something. It’s a very noble cause and that’s why I am posting these pics. Actually that’s a lie. I’m posting these pics because she’s hot. This fundraiser could have been called “Dance For Slavery“ and I’d still put her sexy photos up and fight any man who speaks ill of her.



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I don’t know about you guys, but I haven’t read a magazine in ages. I just don’t see the point since the best photos can be found here on Hollywood Tuna. But today, to my surprise, I came across the latest GQ Magazine with Alessandra Ambrosio, Adriana Lima and the rest of the Victoria’s Secret clan and realized I didn’t have the best pictures after all. But now I do! So without further ado, I present to you the hottest photos on the web.



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The other day, I sinned. I feel dirty, and ashamed for what I did, but I wrote a semi-negative post on Adriana Lima. I never thought the day would come when I would be forced to do such a thing. It’s like picking which hand you’d rather have shoved in a meat grinder. Suffice it to say it was a painful ordeal. I even went as far as proclaiming that Alessandra Ambrosio may in fact be in the lead in terms of who’s the hotter of the two. Well I’m happy to report that Adriana looks super hot in these pics, and has one thing Alessandra doesn’t. Sexy silly faces! I think the score is now tied 1 a piece. The two supermodels have no idea, but they’re now in a heated battle of the babes here on Hollywood Tuna. Who’s going to be the next to slip up? I’ll be watching.



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Adriana Lima doesn’t look all that great in these pics. There, I said it. That sentence alone may get me stoned to death by an angry mob, or sent to hell when I die, but I need to continue. Now I’m not saying she’s ugly. Not even close. I’m just saying she didn’t become the top supermodel on planet Earth by leaving the house sporting ugly dresses, and high tension hair buns like we see here. But everyone is entitled to an off day. Even Adriana Lima, so I’ll let these aberrations slide”¦this time. Next time, I’m afraid it’s going on your permanent record my dear.



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Adriana Lima and body painting. The two go together like rum and coke – a totally delicious combo. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t extremely jealous of that little Latin Hobbit. How the hell did he get this job? Did he answer a newspaper want ad? “Grimy little dude needed to paint the world’s hottest woman. $8.50/hr. Please inquire within” Fine, have your Adriana Lima fun little man, but know this: You’ll always be too short to ride on roller coasters, and you’ll never know the fun you’re missing.



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This is nothing out of the ordinary. Adriana Lima is on the beach ““ again, wearing a tiny bikini ““ again. I could prattle on about how hot she looks, how great her body is or how much I’d prefer to see her completely naked, splashing about in my backyard in a kiddy pool full of olive oil (extra virgin of course), but I won’t. Instead, I’ll just say that if I were on the beach on that particular day and I caught a glimpse of Adriana bending over like she is here, I’d be like a bull charging a matador. The last thing I’d see before going to heaven would be the flash of her red bikini bottoms. Toro!



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Like the rest of you, when I think of Adriana Lima it usually brings to mind a sexy bikini photo shoot, or lingerie spread in a Victoria’s Secret catalogue. So you can imagine my disappointment when I saw these latest pictures of her attending the Dream Girls premiere wearing a head to toe dress. I’ve seen Amish schoolteachers show more skin at church than Adriana did for this event! Don’t get me wrong though, she still looks amazing. With a face like that, it’s pretty hard not to. You could put her head on the body of a Cabbage Patch Kid doll, and I’d still ask for her number.



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In case any of you are new to the site, let me just say that from time to time I’ve been known to pick on celebs that put on some weight. So you can imagine my surprise when I saw these new pictures of a lingerie clad Adriana Lima. From the looks of it, she’s sporting a few extra pounds, and to be honest with you, I don’t think I’ve ever seen her look better! It’s actually a nice change to see a model at the top of her game who doesn’t feel the need to be stick thin. Hopefully more models will try and emulate Adriana because we don’t need to see another runway skeleton die from anorexia, like we did this week. It’s very sad. By the way, don’t think I’m getting soft on all of you. As soon as the latest batch of bloated Mariah Carey pics come out, I’ll be the first to critique them.



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Don’t you hate people that can’t keep their big fat mouths shut? So do I, unless that person happens to be Adriana Lima. Am I the only one that notices that she constantly has her mouth open in pictures? And not “lips slightly parted” open either. I’m talking wide mouthed, tongue out, and raunchy! I love it. Don’t believe me? Well how do you explain this, this, this and this? What is she trying to tell us with all these suggestive oral displays? Is she just really proud of that supermodel tongue of hers, or could she be hinting that she’s only a virgin from the neck down? Let’s ponder that question while checking out these new pics of her backstage at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show.



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It looks like Adriana Lima and her supermodel friends are out shilling lingerie just in time for this year’s Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show on December 5th. I admit, I’ve never watched the broadcast but I have seen plenty of the past events’ pictures. To be honest, that’s enough for me. I mean, how many times can I watch models walk up and down a catwalk before getting bored. Yes, you heard me. Bored. A guy like me needs — no, demands more! Not much more, but just enough to keep my attention in a world where celebrity sex tapes are everywhere and internet porn is free. Maybe Adriana Lima can use that crazy tongue of hers and use it to do something really naughty to Gisele Bundchen. Oh yeah, that would certainly keep me “up” for the full hour!



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Sometimes I really hate seeing pictures of Adriana Lima. Now before you all start thinking I’m some kind of sexual deviant, eunuch or imbecile, allow me to explain. Looking at Adriana is like looking at a top of the line Ferrari. Both are absolutely gorgeous, but you’ll never be able to afford either. In the end, you’re reminded that women like that don’t date guys like you and me! I guess that would be be better for her anyway. If we did date, that prized ass of hers would be so covered in bite marks, that she’d never get a paying gig again.



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Well, it’s that time of year again: when Victoria’s Secret gathers all the hottest models in the world and puts them on an airplane to film the greatest lesbian orgy ever! OK, we all know that isn’t the case, but one can always dream. Actually, Adriana Lima, Heidi Klum, Alessandra Ambrosio, Izabel Goulart, Marisa Miller, Selita Banks and company are out promoting their upcoming fashion show, and new Victoria’s Secret lingerie line. Wow, that was a mouthful. Know what else is a mouthful? Izabel’s hot ass in those jeans. I wouldn’t mind biting into that.



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I don’t what it is, but Adriana Lima‘s facial expressions always seem to turn me on. It’s like a porn facial without the mess. Ok, so I know that’s a little dirty but let’s be honest, that’s what you guys think about when you see pictures of Adriana Lima like this, isn’t it? Don’t tell me I’m the only one. Anyway, here she is introducing the latest Victoria’s Secret fragrance.



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Adriana Lima is, in the tradition of magazine shoots of buxom mediterranean-looking women, dressed up to look like Sofia Loren in her heyday, with bosoms wherever you look. Some might decry this as hackneyed, we prefer to think of it as classic. We don't read Spanish so we don't even have to pretend to care what the accompanying interview says. However, we're going to assume it says something along the lines of "Ha-wa-wa-wawawawawa".



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Despite the way her name reads, Adriana Lima is not llama. She is also not a lime. You may have already known this, but there is probably one soppy little fella out there, nibbling his fingernails and fretting about how on earth he is going to phrase Adriana's name at prestigious social functions. Well Berty (we're going to call him Berty) you can now talk about Adriana without fear.



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Meanwhile on a beach, somewhere sunny and expensive, the lady in question - Adriana Lima - is sunning herself in a bikini and looked sodding brilliant. A little while later, when pictures of her were processed and put up on the internet, a group of feeble men chained to computers in London, would come over a bit flustered. (That's us by the way.)



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All of those preceding events lead us up to here. Today. This moment. Well, maybe not this exact moment, because you might be reading this hundreds of years from now, when you have flying cars and robot pets. If you are then can you shoot someone with a laser just for us. Proper vapourise them, doesn't matter if you get arrested, just jump in a time machine and sort things out.



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Actually whilst you're using a time machine can you come back to Wednesday 28 July 2010 at 5:55PM and give us a future burger. Ah here you are now. Right on time. Thanks future man. Mmmmm, this is a tasty future burger we're eating. Nom, nom, nom.



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Obviously supermodel Adriana Lima and I have had a love affair for several years now, that’s pretty clear, but I promised her I would keep in under wraps because we wouldn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea. I mean, she’s a supermodel and I’m a celebrity blogger, society says that our relationship is forbidden. Well here she is blowing me a kiss at some Victoria’s Secret fashion night outt, completely blowing our cover. Thanks a lot sweetheart. I’ve got a lot of blogging relationships I need to maintain and now that they know that we’ve got a thing going, that’s all going to change… They’re all going to be over at my house at bath time.